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Kids, Computers, Sex and Drugs?
The Reality of the Problem and Solution!

 

Well, how many children do we have in our group? What if your kids began to take an interest in this project. How could they help us, and what could we do for them.

In my opinion, kids these days are totally "AWESOME".

They are not scared of anything. Hit any key to continue means exactly what it says! Kids know that! They are not afraid to see what else is going to happen. They still have a creative imagination, and that is the essence of creativity and entrepreneurial skills. Do you think they might take up an interest in HTML or web development? Do you think that might be an educational value to them? Do you think that they might be able to market that skill? I would think so! If we don't give them marketable skills, what is going to happen to them when they graduate High School? Maybe they will get a good job at the Mill, maybe a good job at the ????. I know what you are thinking! The same thing happened to me! I graduated, worked for WCI for 8 years, and left Bogalusa in search for a better job. Now all of our kids are gone! What are we going to be? A retirement community? Lets create something for our children. Lets give them the knowledge that they need to develop a marketable skill. Why not give them something that they can use right here in Bogalusa? Web skills are marketable all over the world. All you have to have is an Internet connection. My brother works for IBM, from the comfort of his "Home Office". I supported 300 computers at a manufacturing facility, and multiple remote offices, "Right from my Home Office".
What are some things that we can do for our kids, that will help them, and in return, they can help us? Well, we can teach them how to mow the lawn, and bring in the mail! Just kidding!

Delivery of Information
I think everybody knows that "Information is Money". Delivery of that information is the key to "Making Money". If I had my life to live over again, I would right now be developing "Web Enabled Databases". Why? Well, lets say that we are going to use the theory that "Bill Gates" uses, and apply it to what is going to happen in the next 10 years!
I don't know if you know this fellow or not, but if you don't, you probably don't live on planet Earth, so I won't tell you that he is the mind behind Microsoft. What has he done? Simple. Write once, sell many! Write the program one time, and sell it as many times as you can! How much does each copy of a Windows product cost Mr. Gates? Well, when you are buying several million boxes, CD's and books for your product, how much do you think it costs per box? Now you get the idea.
Lets say that your son or daughter found a need, and wrote a good program to sell to those with that business need. This would be a niche market for the time that you were the only developer of that "One" software that sourced that need. No one does "Windows" like Bill Gates does, that's why no one else has his share of the market.
Do you think that if it was a solution that solved a business need that it would be marketable? WOW! I should say so! I can't tell you how many projects I was given by companies where I was asked to solve a business problem, and I had to get developers to design and develop solutions for me! One such project comes immediately to my mind.
We paid $60,000.00 gladly to get a fellow, working out of his house in Lafayette, La. to develop a program for a production line at a Rubber manufacturing facility I consulted with. It took him about 3 months to develop that program. (That's $20k per month for sitting in your home office). Wanna know the kicker? We paid him $1500.00 per month to support the product after that? Guess how many times I called him in a 12 month period? Two times. Each time, it required about two hours of his time! I'll do the calculation for you on that one. ($4,500.00 per hour). What did he know that made him so valuable? A database, and some HTML, with some low level C programming that allowed him to trigger some machines, and get information from some scales, etc.. Could your kids do that? Absolutely! I knew this one person possessed the skills that I knew were needed to develop the program. I told him exactly what we needed, gave him a diagram of the data flow, and he consulted me when each module was finished to see how to integrate the next module. How easy was that?

My kid is not interested in Computers!
Maybe he is like I used to be. Maybe he doesn't know that his computer can do more than games! Just give me one hour with him, and let me tell him that he can build his own web site, have his own domain name, (like this one), E-mail address, and that he and his friends can start their own forums, mailing lists, Ezines, and about 10 thousand other "Really Cool" things right on his web site.

Still think he would not be interested? What if he has been mowing the neighbors lawn for a little spending cash each week. He's already built his own web site by now. He and his friends are learning how to do Web Graphics. Now Mr. Jones down the street wants to have a web site for his business. He has seen what the kids can do, and they are really good. Now they have their first paying customer, and Mr. Jones is ecstatically pleased with his new web site.
Did anybody ever teach you about partnerships in school? Did you learn how to balance your checkbook? Did you know how to look for a job when you graduated? What marketable skill did you posses when you graduated from High School? Do you know other people with College degrees that are still not making it in toady society? I'll bet you do!
When I made $6.00 per hour, I used to think that $15.00 per hour was "Big" money! When I made $15.00 per hour, I thought $30.00 was big money. When I made $30.00 per hour,, and I'll stop here, but you know what computer support is worth in a big city.

What is the problem with making any amount of money per hour? Most people spend what they make! They live paycheck to paycheck. Why is this? It's because that is how we are taught to live. We are given credit cards to make it through College. Life is all about budgeting, and it is up to us to teach them. When do you think we should let our children learn about it? After they wake up one morning and realize that they have a $5k credit card debt? Has anyone else reading this ever been here?

How can we do this? Well, you can tell your kids whatever you want. What it all boils down to is that they are going to believe what they want to believe. They are going to learn by their own experiences. How they learn can be directed by you. Just feed them a little here, and a little there, and guide them in the direction that "They want to go". You've heard the expression, you can lead a horse to water, but you cannot make him drink".
The trick is,,, take him when he is thirsty! <grin>.

If you want credibility and authority when you talk to your kids? Stop lying to them!

How does this affect our kids!
I have to tell you a few things from a kids point of view. I know this is a very controversial topic. Please keep an open mind here, or you may decide you don't like me very much! Let me show you how this directly relates to Kids, Computer, Sex and Drugs.
Maybe you will agree, maybe you won't. But it surely doesn't hurt to look at something from someone else's point of view, now does it?
When do we start lying to our kids? Very early in life I'm afraid. Now, you can do whatever you want, but listen to what happened to me when I was growing up, and see if you can remember if you ever felt the same way.
Since when did an Easter bunny start laying eggs anyway? The last bunny I saw did not come from any Egg! I think I read in Science class that a rabbit was a mammal. No eggs here!
Why does Santa Claus with all of those Elves not sign his own "Christmas Presents"? Every label I ever saw all had Mom and Dad's handwriting on them!
How does that fat sucker get down that little hole in the chimney anyway? And if he really did, how could he possibly still have a red and white suit after he came down any chimney?
How is he going to visit all of the kids in Bogalusa, much less than all of the kids in the world in one night? Flying Reindeer? Come on now! How dumb do you really think our kids are? And the more of these questions you answer, the more you are deceiving them, instead of telling them the truth! What about "In God We Trust"? We take them to church, they don't hear about Santa Claus there do they? No, because that is not what Christmas or Easter is all about!
Just how long should we for whatever reason, tell those lies?
And the bad part about this is, "They believe you!" They believe you because they trust you! They argue and fight for the right to defend you, "Because Mom Said it Was". Then they learn the real truth! Can you imagine that thought? From a young innocent mind, having to wonder why Mommy and Daddy Lied to me! Have you ever explained to your kids why you Lied to them? Have you ever asked them why they lied to you? For whatever reason you justify that, it all still boils down to the fact, "Why did you feel like you had to Lie to them in the first place". If you ever wondered, it's because every body else does it. If you did not, that just makes your testimony all the more credible!

Now, years later, your kids are in Junior High, and High School. What is going to happen now? Well, if you don't know, here is a little reality for you! Drugs, Drugs and more Drugs. Sex, Sex and more Sex. Alcohol, Cigarettes, and more of each of them!
Don't believe it, just ask around. Just read the news papers. Now that you know your kids are going to be approached by their "Friends" with it, what are you going to do? I don't know what you tell your kids, but I have to tell you what I was told, and how it affected me when I had my first encounter with drugs. I thought if you messed with drugs, you were immediately going to become a mindless creature. "THIS IS YOUR MIND,, THIS IS YOUR MIND ON DRUGS!".

When are we going to learn that "Scare Tactics" don't work on the "Fearless" children of today's society! Are you familiar with the "No Fear" logo? Hmm! It is weak to be afraid. Don't you remember the bullies in school? Kids have to show no fear if they are going to get along. Remember the kid who was afraid of everything. Yeah, that one. The one that got beat up all of the time. The one that got the short end of every stick.

What happens when your kids go to a new school? They pick and evaluate who they would consider to be their friends. An educated decision making process. They pick a few guys and girls that they think are "Cool". They make good grades, they seem to be friendly, and they seem to be really fun people to associate with. Now, as kids, we know about drugs! "MOM SAID!" If I mess with drugs, I'm going to loose my mind! RIGHT! And then one day, some of the guys that your kids have evaluated as being candidates for good friends, ask your kids to go to lunch, or somewhere after school, or somewhere on the weekend. Hey! This is my chance to get into the "Cool" group! Then, quietly as he sits there evaluating what is going on around him, he sees several of his new friends "smoking a funny cigarette". Within a few minutes, it gets passed around and "your kid" says, no thanks! Whewww!
Then he gets to thinking! These guys are "Cool". They make good grades. They are not talking about seeing "Pink Elephants". They are having fun! They are laughing, cutting up, and everyone looks like they are doing just fine. (Remember these kids aren't dumb, We Raised them!) Obviously they are not "Mindless Creatures", and this is definitely not the first time that anyone here has done this. So again, "MOM and DAD" are not telling the truth! So, why not try it! They lied about Santa Claus, and the Easter buny! That didn't hurt me any, RIGHT! Why should this? So what do you really think happened here! I had no legitimate reason to believe anything I was told about drugs was valid! Did I partake with my new friends? Well, I'm 40 years old, and I was with some of your kids, so, I won't answer that question! I would not want to be like some previous Presidents we know! Lets just leave you thinking about the concept here. Don't get me wrong. I think my Mom and Dad did the best that they could do for me. I know that they never made a decision that wasn't made in my better interest. I think society in general has some really big flaws, and I think is is up to every Parent to at least evaluate this attitude. I know that I feel differently about it because of my upbringing. I'm sure it was quite a bit different when Mom's and Dad's were growing up, and we need to keep that in mind when we view our teenagers and the problems that they are now facing. Sometimes we don't know better!

I'm sorry for rambling, but "If I knew then, what I know Now", life would be so different! Does anyone agree with me here! How can that knowledge help us! We are past the "IF" stage of our lives. We can now only give our kids the "Best that We can Give Them". Treat them like adults. If you go around lying to everyone you meet, you won't have very many friends. Your kids are the greatest thing in the World. Give them an opportunity! Give them an educated Life!

Girls, and how do they fit in?
I was recently in Atlanta for a wedding of a friend of my wife.
All of the attendees were of Non-American decent, except for myself. Some had been over here long enough to get Americanized. Their Culture seems to hold the family relationship a bit more sacred than the average American family. Stay with me here for a moment!
There were quite a few people at this gathering. It was quite a celebration. There were devout believers, and there was a stone cold alcoholic. There were good kids, great kids, and there were the average kids, and there were the bad kids. I happened to be standing near a absolutely beautiful 21 year old girl, that completely amazed me. She was very pretty, but she was an absolutely beautiful person on the inside. I asked her what I thought was a typical question for a girl her age, and her reply to my question had me so dumb struck, I failed to respond at all to her reply! Later, we sat down, and had a wonderful conversation. There were several boys running around playing. One hit the other (bad idea-he was a mean little sucker), and he picked up a stick an started chasing the other around the yard, cursing worse than a box full of sailors.
The 21 year old, leaned over the balcony, and said with her eyes wide open " My mother would kill me if I had said something like that!". Come on! From a 21 year old girl? After a few minutes of conversation, I asked her if she was dating anyone at her college. She was a straight "A" student in college according to her mom. She looked me straight in the eyes, and said, "No! Why should I date? I'm not planning on getting married just yet!" I was completely floored! She was focused on her studies, and enjoyed her studies and knew that it was a valid effort, and it was worth completing at whatever costs. My point here is that if you give a kid something that they can see value in, they will often grab on with all four feet, and stick with it to the end. I spoke with the mother at great length about her children. I really did not see any tricks, but there were no Santa Clauses, and No Easter bunnies! When I mentioned it to her, she gave me a very strange look and said. I still don't understand why Americans think that lying to their children is good! I don't lie to my kids. Sometimes they will not get an answer, but I will not lie to them.

My Kids are Bad! They would not be interested in Computers!
What if we have accomplished our goal of getting "Good Internet Access". The kids at school "Wow" over what we have done? Would that not be reason of itself to interest your kids? When the word gets around, everybody is going to want to "Come to Your House" to download something, etc.. Good kids, with constructive interests that are begging to become your kids friends! What a change? What a tool?
When your kids misbehave, what do you do? Well, number one, if they have a hobby like learning how to use computers, and developing marketable skills, how bad could they be? If they got more satisfaction out of loading a new program, and sharing it with their friends, would that not be better than "Hiding, and Sneaking" around on Friday and Saturday night with the "Other Friends". I don't think so, I know so! So, how is this a tool?
By threatening their access privileges, you threaten their communication with their friends! They are probably working on a project right now. Together! And Mike needs Joe to finish his part so Mary can keep working. And if Joe is punished, he can't finish! Now Mike and Mary become your disciplinarians. What a concept! Using their peer group to help with disciplinary actions. Kids don't usually keep an interest for a long period of time, but the computer and the Internet are resources that he/she will definitely use. My wife, as I am typing this portion of this page, is asking me what "CAGR" is? I have looked over the documentation, and I can't tell either. I know about what it is, but I am not perfectly certain. Twenty seconds later (I'm already dialed up), I am printing a set of pages for her, and marking a book mark on a "Free Web Based CAGR Calculator", in case she needs to check calculations later. Anyone ever heard of Neem Oil? Well I did some heavy research on it the other day on a site out of India. Last week, some detailed products out of Romania. The Internet is absolutely a resource beyond efficient!

Can Internet Access be bad for my kids?
Well, too much table salt can be bad for them! Absolutely! Anything, whether it is good, or bad, can be good or bad for them! It is all about family interaction. If you share common interests with your kids, you can be a very tight knit family! "The family that Works together Plays together", and "The Family that Plays together, Stays Together". What if Mom and Dad help the kids get a small E-Commerce site Running? They will probably need your help with the Credit card, and Checking account part of the sign up process. What if the kids sell something that they have engineered, or made?
I don't want my kid sitting in front of the computer 12 hours a day! Help give them direction! Suggest the above, and give them some ideas! Don't have any ideas of your own! Well, lets all get together one evening (Parents) and sit down and drink some coffee together and see what we can come up with. Lets support our kids. Hey, if they come up with a "Safety Pin", or a "Hoola Hoop", lets put our funds together and help them build and market it! What have we to loose. If we die, they are going to get what we have anyway, right! Lets teach them about life, and how to live! Do I have all of the answers. I think not! But together, all things are possible! I could start quoting Biblical scriptures here, but I'm sure most of you know which ones I would mention.

What about the Kids that broke into the White House and Pentagon?
Amazing isn't it! I think we would all have to agree that kids are amazing! What about the kids that did that? Well, the 12 or 13 year old will probably be working for the NSA, CIA, FBI, NCSA, or something by the time he is 18. He will probably have all of this College tuition paid for him. Maybe not! Maybe he is in Jail. I don't think so! We have a system called "Justice". What would be the benefit in throwing a 12 year old kid in jail for being talented, and misguided? Well, it is incredibly effective for the ones that don't know, or who are easily intimidated! I would think that if there were 10 thousand kids out there, each thinking about hacking, each of them might have taken a different avenue because of that threat. That threat was real. Remember, we believe everything we see on TV, right? Knowing, if that kid was that good, and he still got caught, maybe I'd better not mess around! Other projects might be more appealing to them after that. In reality, this might have never happened! And maybe it did? Maybe he is in private schools now, working for our Government in some sort of Security area. What better way to stop a hacker than to become one!
Here again is the same issue. Direction. You have to be a leader to teach a leader how to lead! If we develop this "Wired Neighborhood" you will find that there are experts in various fields that share you concern, and a common interest in kids that are 100% willing to share their knowledge and expertise. You will be informed in what areas that you do not want your children. You will be informed how to check up on your kids. You will learn what is valuable and what is detrimental. Heck, you will become educated in your children's interests. And they will be a valuable source of information for you too.

Don't have the time to spend with your kids! Shame on you! What's wrong? What if your kids work half as much as you, and make twice the money! Would you be willing to sit down and let them teach you a little something! I think you have the time!

I don't think anyone reading this site works any more hours than I do, and I will make the time. Over the last month, I have worked nonstop several times for 48, and 72 hours straight. If I can make time, anyone can!
But what do we ask from you! A signature, and a commitment from you that you want to join us in procuring Internet access. After we have it, you'll begin to see what is going on around you, and you will become interactive with us. Maybe offering value to us in your own area of expertise. Either way, you will begin to value your neighbors, and get to know them a bit better. Why heck, if you are going to sit down and have dinner, why not have some company?

Lets get Signed up, and get the ball rolling!

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